Saturday, 23 February 2013

I am water.


So. I got told I was water.  I stuck out my lip and pouted, feeling somewhat offended. Watery? Not terribly exciting, is it? I mean, it’s a bit like being told you’re a pig in the Chinese year thingy – when really you wanna be a dragon or a snake or a tiger or…anything really but just not a solid old pig.  And, well, water is so...wet.  

Water? WATER? I mean, I’m a Capricorn, for heaven’s sake. Well, not so heavenly. Cardinal Earth. Okay, so the Capricorn goat is a sea goat. Okay okay, it’s half a fish. But I can just about handle that.  Believe it or not, I can keep my feet on the ground. Sometimes.  And an astrologer once stared at my chart in amazement and said it was “unusual”.

Apparently I have five planets in Sagittarius.  Which could explain my wanderlust (wonderlust?) I suppose – and the odd impulsive ‘slash and burn’ feelings that rise up from time to time.  But then again, my moon is in Pisces.  And they (the infamous They) often say that one's moon sign is more telling than one’s sun sign.  And Pisces, of course, is very very watery. Downright fishy.

And then, I pondered, in the I Ching, I appear always as Tui, the Lake, the youngest daughter (as indeed I am). And “many strange things can push up from the depth of the lake, whose surface lies so quiet” (Diana ffarington Hook).
Dead Moon I Ching...

And, the more I thought about it, the more I thought it was probably true. This water thingy.  Cos, really, I’m more than fluid.  My ego boundaries are so rubbish, so pathetically permeable, that I can become almost anyone, anything. Like the robots in Terminator – but without the knife-hand things.  I talk to someone and I pick up their intonation, their speech patterns. I read a book and the author’s voice often infects my own writing.  I can nearly always see the other point of view – no matter how strange or odd it might seem. I can put myself into nearly anyone’s shoes and not just walk in them but do a marathon.  I’m rubbish in debates as I can always play devil’s advocate.  And other people are all so certain, so sure, so knowing of who they are and for what they stand and in what they believe. And that makes me feel...if not watery, then at least amorphous.   

Do I really have no shape of my own?  Do I just spread out, filling the container into which I’m placed? Do I exist only to show other people their reflection in my glassy surface? 

Sometimes I feel so very unreal.  J

And you? Which element describes you? Summons you? Truthfully. In(tui)tively. 


9 comments:

skybluepinkish said...

On that basis i'm water too.

i can have fire in my belly when there is injustice, particularly where my children are concerned.

i run my house in an orderly down to earth manner with lots of lists and systems and everything in its place.

Wind, possibly in the way i blow through and diperse cobwebs and unecessary rubbish.

Water in that i too adapt, absorb, merge and become. But that is who i am so that defines me rather than makes me "nothing" so to speak.

Midlife Singlemum said...

I wanted to be pure fresh water, or spiritual air, or even a feisty fire but apparently I am Earth. I find that heavy, maybe a bit grubby, and decidedly boring. I mean I'd much rather float, fly or dance than ... what? Plod in the sod? (Btw I think I may also be a pig, or a scrawny hen.)

Greta said...

I'm a Scorpio, which is a water sign, and my moon is in Pisces and I have Scorpio rising. It's all very wet wet wet. But you know, when you think about it, water is just about the most powerful element around. It grinds down earth, quenches fire and air might pull it up - but not for long. Yay water.

Frances said...

We are all full of water, Jane, and like the oceans react to full moons.

Alert...next full moon on my calendar isn't far off. 2/25 over here in the States.

xo

the veg artist said...

Be grateful it's water. I was once told that I was like a piece of rubber in the way I adapted myself to people and situations. Flattering, no?

Ashen said...

I'm thankful for the people around me who express water qualities, the fixed signs in my chart correspond mainly to fire and air, apart from one earth sign, otherwise I'd float with the angels. Apparently there is a spiritual flow high in my chart via Neptun.
The elements less expressed in this pattern challenged me to befriend them. Like becoming a mother grounded me, as did gardening. And I love being near water, and swimming.

Sessha Batto said...

Nothing wrong or weak about water - without violence, slowly, calmly, implacably, it can wear away mountains ;) me, I'm fire - volatile, easily fanned or extinguished, recklessly consuming everything in my path.

zenandtheartoftightropewalking said...

Kryptonite

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