Showing posts with label zombies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label zombies. Show all posts

Wednesday, 24 August 2011

Inappropriate parenting, zombie bloodbaths and clearing up dog shit

‘Those boys have been on the Xbox all day.’  Adrian was standing at the door of my office, hands on hips (the ones he insists he doesn’t have) glaring at me.  Downstairs I could hear the happy sounds of zombies being blasted at point blank range by James and his friend Bob. No, he wasn't christened Bob but for some strange reason none of James’s friends are called by their real names – hence we have Dave and Gobby and Klinks and Ferret and Pong. A few of his classmates get called by their surnames in a rather delightfully old-fashioned public school fashion while a few more are addressed by their full names (all the time) – which is equally odd.  Only Nathan is called….Nathan (which now, by dint of comparison, seems peculiar).
Anyhow, this prolonged zombie blood-bath somehow appeared to be my fault.  I raised an eyebrow. 
‘Well, it’s ridiculous.’ 
I nodded.  Sometimes it’s best just to agree.
‘They should be outside.’
‘What? Playing at the Famous Five?’  I looked towards the window where the rain was doing the rain equivalent of a Ginger Baker drum solo. 
‘It’s only a bit of rain. Children should do wholesome things.’ 

Sheesh.  When did my husband turn into The Killer of All Childish Joy?  This is, after all, the man who used to work for the NME, who played in an indie band, who rode a big motorbike and once upon a time had pupils like saucers half the waking day.  He sure as hell wasn’t no angel. Yet now he’s turned into Mr Morality and he and James are having increasing run-ins, usually over the most trivial of sins. 
‘He eats too many sweets.’  ‘He watches too much television.’  ‘He wears his trousers too low.’ ‘He’s on the Internet too much.’ ‘He eats rubbish.’ ‘He swears like a trooper.’ ‘He’s lazy.’ ‘He’s snippy.’

Yes, he’s probably right but I dunno, I cut the boy a bit of slack in the holidays, mainly because (if we’re really honest) most of his sins (apart from the TV and the trousers too low bit) are ones I share with him.  And James and I, we get along just fine, we really do.  We simply don’t rub one another up the wrong way.  Maybe it’s because we share the same number and direction in Feng Shui terms (while Adrian is out on a tangent). But James and Adrian…ye gods.  I comfort myself by saying it’s a young stag/old stag thing – that they need, in primal psychological terms to face up to one another and clash antlers occasionally; to waft their testosterone in each other’s general directions and bellow.  But, bloody hell, it’s tiring.  Why can’t men just talk things through reasonably, like women do?  Why all the archetypal drama? 
‘Anyhow, I was thinking,’ continued Adrian.  ‘You are listening, right?’
‘What?  Oh yes, absolutely.’
‘Well, I’m going to get them clearing up the garden…’

That woke me up. ‘WHAT?’  ‘Clearing up the garden’ is a euphemism for wandering around mournfully, shovel in hand, clearing dog turds from the lawn. 
‘What do you mean, what?’
‘Well, you can’t seriously expect Bob to clean up our dogs’ turds. I mean, can you imagine it?  Bob  goes home and his mother says, ‘So, Bob, what did you do at James’s house?’ and Bob replies, ‘Oh, such wizard gapes, Mater – we spent our afternoon shovelling dog shit and burying it in a large pit.’ I mean, it wouldn’t be so bad if he’d been here before but it’s his First Time and you want him on poop scoop duty?’
I looked at Adrian and he looked at me.  Then we both burst out laughing. 
‘Yeah, okay,’ he said. ‘I’ll concede that one.’
‘I know our parenting skills aren’t brilliant but that really would be scraping the barrel.’

But it got me thinking, maybe we are missing a trick here.  Okay, so not on the First Visit –but after that?  Just think of all those other totally inappropriate things one could get a visiting child to do (and -evil laugh - because they're visiting and Being Polite, they would probably do them). 
·         Clean the lavatories
·         De-louse the dogs
·         Sort out our underwear drawers
·         Pick hair out of the shower

No, these are NOT the boys...
I’ll stop there but, in fact, sod it, think bigger, Jane.  Let’s get a house party together – drag in Pong and Gobby and Dave and George Clark and Sticklepath and, er, Nathan – and get ‘em stripping the walls and rewiring the hallway or clearing the vegetable patch and building a pagoda.

As a treat afterwards, I could stick fake facial hair on them and sneak them into The Inbetweeners (cos I’m desperate to see it myself) and then go down the pub for a round of Snakebites. 
It’s a plan, right? 

I must have been musing out loud because Adrian just shook his head sadly, hitched up his two sizes too large jeans from Mole Valley (oh, alas, to think that once he would only wear 501s) and walked away.  But I’m not giving up, oh no.  

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Soft Toy Serial Killers

Everyone has an unpretty side. A part they don’t like to admit.  A dark side of the moon.  I can be a crappy person, I really can. I look at myself in the mirror and I don’t like what I see. I’m a crappy mother; I’m a crappy wife. I’m a lousy daughter-in-law; a rubbish aunt; a shitty godmother (whatever possessed them to choose godless me?) and I’m not always the best of friends, no matter how hard I try.  I was a damn good daughter though, and I sometimes think that sucked the goodness and prettiness out of me – it was so damn greedy it left me parched. 

I try, I really try but sometimes I just feel like I’m stretched too thin – pull me a little further and I’ll snap into two and the parts will float away, straggles of skin reaching helplessly towards one another as they vanish into the ether.
But then I suspect other people feel that way too.  And this isn’t a ‘me, me, me’ post – it’s not remotely asking for validation; for comfort.  It’s just an observation. 

And, anyhow, what does it mean, this crappiness?  That we’re not perfect?  Well, what human is?  We’re so quick to judge, so quick to condemn, aren’t we?  Some of us judge ourselves; we all judge others.  And what is it we judge?  Why, surely just our own shadow sides, displayed in other people?  A conversation at Zumba last night showed the point.  Someone I know gets a lot of grief in town – she’s the ‘bad girl’, the ‘transgressor’, the ‘scarlet woman’.  Tongues wag; people turn away, they give her filthy looks. And they are so perfect, right? They are so righteous?  I’m not one for biblical references but, by heck, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”   

I suspect she constellates their shadow – their dirty laundry, their fear.  Jung said that the shadow is the part of us that contains our secrets, all the forbidden feelings and ways of behaviour that lie hidden from our consciousness.  The shadow comes to us most strongly in dreams, as the frightening “other” – the harlot, the murderer, the thief, the zealot, the overbearing teacher, the pathetic wimp, the whining child, the down-and-out.  The shadow carries everything we push aside in waking conscious life, all those qualities that don’t fit with our ideal image of ourselves.


You wanna find your own shadow?  Think about who winds you up.  Who really really annoys you?  What is it about them that is so so so….fecking annoying, irritating, plain wrong?  Ten to one it’s your own shadow being reflected right back at you.

Anyhow… 

We’re all a bit crappy, okay?  Yeah, even the Soul Puppy.  Most of the time he is soft and biscuity and winsome.  But, every so often, he breaks into serial killer mode and chews the faces off soft toys.  He gouges out eyes; he bites off noses; he chews on cheeks.  Always faces.  Honestly, I have a pile of eyes sitting on my desk.  Can’t help but be reminded of my demon, Samael.  He’s a face biter too.  Tellingly this was an aspect of the book that editors couldn’t handle (along with the hacking off of zombie heads with spades L).  The face biting had to go.  But – see – he chewed off faces to reveal people; to show their true selves; to splice aside the façade and show the shadow…  
And, hmm, maybe people just aren’t ready to do that…


Lest We Forget: Those Who Have Fallen....


Badger: full facial removal

Panter: eye, nose excision

Snowy: eye removed; ear lost

Just a few who have fallen to the dark side of the SP....and no, we don't go for very imaginative names in this house... :)